This video presents an insightful interview with entrepreneur Emma Grede, offering practical advice for cultivating a thriving career and a balanced personal life. Grede underscores the importance of overcoming the fear of others' opinions, advocating for a strong focus on self-worth and individual expectations. She shares her journey, from excelling as a sandwich maker to building a business empire, by embracing a proactive "I'll do that" mindset and visualizing her desired future. Grede challenges the conventional advice to "follow your passion," suggesting instead to identify and nurture natural skills that provide energy and competence. She also discusses the double standards women face in business and how to combat them by setting personal non-negotiable standards and being transparent about trade-offs. The discussion concludes with advice to aspiring entrepreneurs to start small, test ideas on accessible platforms, and continuously learn and adapt.
Emma recounts numerous instances where she missed opportunities due to fear of judgment.
She admits to staying quiet, not putting herself forward, and avoiding conversations due to this fear.
Acknowledged realizing that even highly successful people are "making it up as they go along."
Emma highlights that being risk-averse is often an inherent trait for women, partly due to societal pressures.
She has consciously focused on redirecting the energy from fear into productive avenues.
The Double Standards for Women in Business [04:09]
Jay introduces a study showing men apply for jobs with 40% qualification while women often don't apply even with 80%.
Emma affirms that real barriers exist for women in business, beyond self-doubt.
She actively builds companies with women in leadership roles, believing they make better hiring decisions.
She cites examples of men overstating their abilities compared to women who downplay theirs, even when highly competent.
Women face significant criticism for being "braggadocious" or stepping out of conventional roles, unlike men who might receive praise for similar actions.
Emma recalls receiving backlash for speaking on a subject while a prominent businessman received millions of likes for a similar public statement.
She chooses to lean into these conversations and own her truth, believing that conforming to expectations like being "demure" or "likable" actually holds other women back.
Emma introduces her three-word mantra for career acceleration: "I'll do that."
She describes always volunteering for tasks, even if initially uncertain.
Jay recalls Richard Branson's advice: say yes to opportunities and then figure out how to do it.
This proactive approach, embracing vulnerability, creates pressure that helps individuals step up and grow.
Emma also shares that as a child, she visualized the life she wanted, akin to "manifestation," and genuinely believed in her potential due to a supportive upbringing with no limitations.
Jay highlights that competence is the foundation of confidence, not the other way around.
If you focus on what you're good at, you're more likely to dedicate the time to excel, which in turn builds confidence.
Relying solely on passion can lead to giving up when things get difficult, whereas competence encourages perseverance.
What’s Actually Distracting Us From True Focus? [18:23]
Emma identifies a prevailing cultural belief that one must be good at many things, leading to scattered focus.
She argues that true focus is a "force multiplier" in all aspects of life and business.
Jay references Bruce Lee's quote about fearing the person who practiced one kick 10,000 times, not 10,000 kicks once.
Emma views herself as an "excellent merchant," focusing deeply on understanding what people want to buy and its price, and repeating that skill across businesses.
She notes that success doesn't get easier; it demands more work and sacrifice, requiring deep focus on one thing.
Build a Circle That Complements Your Strengths [20:52]
Jay discusses the "StrengthFinder" test, which identifies an individual's top 5 strengths. His number one strength was "strategy," which he discovered through the test.
Emma identifies her core strengths as an unbelievable ability to focus, resilience, and a strong work ethic.
She also acknowledges her weaknesses, such as impatience.
The key, Emma states, is understanding your own strengths and weaknesses, then surrounding yourself with friends, business partners, and colleagues who possess complementary skills.
Emma shares her experience as a working mother of four. Her young children describe her job as "going to work all the time."
She consciously shifted her narrative from apologizing for working to expressing her love for her work, teaching her children that it's okay to pursue their dreams unashamedly.
Jay reflects on his own mother, a breadwinner who worked tirelessly, and how her example instilled his work ethic.
He notes that "time doesn't equal love," and parents often face immense societal pressure to be perfect in every role, which is unrealistic.
Emma describes an exercise she undertook after her first child: writing down her non-negotiables.
These are personal standards and priorities, such as attending significant school events or taking an annual girls' trip, that she will not compromise on.
She distinguishes her non-negotiables from societal pressures, like creating "Instagrammable lunchboxes," which she does not prioritize.
Regularly reassessing these non-negotiables helps her align her actions with her values, adapting as her children grow and her life changes.
The challenge arises when people adopt someone else's standards as their own, leading to dissatisfaction.
Emma highlights that women disproportionately face questions about "balancing it all" compared to men.
She openly discusses her reliance on nannies and other help, emphasizing that she has no problem asking for assistance, both in her personal life and business.
Emma advocates for authenticity and transparency, encouraging others to stop "lying" about the realities of their lives and the trade-offs they make.
She shares her own trade-offs, like missing family dinners to participate in the event, and asserts that she doesn't feel guilty about these choices.
Owning Your Truth Creates New Opportunities [37:46]
Emma launched her podcast, "Aspire with Emma Grede," to counter "toxic positivity" and honestly discuss the effort and trade-offs required for success.
The podcast aims to scale mentorship by providing direct conversations with inspiring individuals.
It helps people understand the reality of building a dream life, recognizing that opportunities and definitions of success vary.
Emma believes that approaching such ventures with good intentions leads to "unbelievable things."
Start Small: Scale Down and Test Your Idea [40:59]
An audience member, Kate, pitches a food industry TV show idea called "Stage," featuring celebrities in diverse food-related challenges.
Emma advises Kate to "start small" and "test and learn" by scaling down her idea.
Instead of waiting for a big Netflix pitch, she suggests testing components of the show on smaller platforms like YouTube or Instagram, perhaps with friends instead of celebrities.
This approach allows for iteration and learning without the pressure of a large production.
Jay reinforces this by sharing his own experience: his initial TV show pitch was rejected seven years ago, which led him to start his successful podcast, "On Purpose."
Both emphasize that the most important step is to simply start and take action.
Emma Grede and Jay Shetty offering advice to an audience member about starting small
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